Saturday, February 1, 2014

Idiots On Parade



Okay; this Global Warming bit has really gotten out of hand.

Really? A hiker trapped by a blizzard for two days? In Hawaii?!?!?!

How on God's Green Earth do you face the life threatening prospect of a BLIZZARD in Hawaii? Magnum P.I. was on for eight seasons and I never saw so much as a snowflake.

That's Dumass #1.

For Dumass #2 lets follow the SUV I followed yesterday on my way home. I first notice this idiot trying to pass a car stopped at a Stop sign. On a two way street. Then the idiot gets into a left turn only lane, and continues straight through the intersection. The next time I run into this Dumass is a block or two later; sitting in a left turn only lane at a Green Light. The intersection has two lanes headed north- the way our Dumass wishes to turn- and one lane of traffic westbound turning north and one lane of traffic eastbound, headed north. Our Dumass sits through THE ENTIRE GREEN LIGHT- with multiple horns sounding- and then turns left as soon as the light changes to red.

Wait; it gets worse. Dumass #3 is right behind Dumass #2, and does THE EXACT SAME THING! they must have been related. I am the fourth car from the light and sat through 3 cycles before I could turn. I am still half deafened by the horn of the truck behind me. You have heard the phrase 'leaned on the horn'? This guy was Standing on the horn. and being a truck the horn wasn't below my bumper, but right in my rear window.

Not the most relaxing way to start a Friday night.

Now lets move on to what I did with my lunchtime. I renewed my car tags. That was actually a fairly pleasant experience, for dealing with a government entity anyway. The line moved quickly, the clerk I dealt with was very competent and friendly and I was in and out in in about 10 minutes; on the last day of the month. In prior years that would have been a 30-40 minute exercise.

Ah; but there is a Dumass # 4 lurking in the lunchtime adventures; I just don't know who it is.

First, something I did not know until today, is that Driver's Licenses are handled by the same department of Kentucky State government as the the court cases are. In each Kentucky County there is a Fiscal Court Clerk and Clerk of Courts. I had always ASSUMED that the Court Clerk I saw for a driver's license was the same Clerk who handled the land records. But its not; its the same clerk you would see to file a court action. So when the County built its latest (UGLY) Taj Mahal, the driver's license department joined the Clerk of Courts in the new Court building.

Which means there is only one entrance to the building- as far from the parking lot as you can get- AND you must go through full COURT SECURITY to get in. TO RENEW A DRIVER'S LICENSE!!!!!!! Whoever designed this system is Dumass # 4.

Then I get downstairs to where the actual folks are who print your new license. Where there is a line. I am behind a woman, her mother and her 3 year old son. While Mom has to renew her license and change her address, is Grandma watching the kid? Nope; apparently the pattern of the ceiling tile has her fascinated. Kid is running around like the Tasmanian Devil, until he finds the water fountain. The he becomes as enamored in watching water flow as Grandma is in the ceiling tile. Mom turns around, sees Grandma starring transfixed at the ceiling and does not see son anywhere and flips out.

Mom hollers: Where is Dexter? Mom is able to reply immediately: Hell; I don't know. So why did Grandma visit the License Bureau if not to keep an eye on Dexter? Apparently her license needs renewal as well. And has since July.

I'm not sure how the situation turned out. Window 2 suddenly opened up and I had my own drama to become absorbed in. Well apparently if you have a debit/credit card the license folks can only use it as a debit card. Fine; I'll do the debit.  Oh; there is a $2 charge to use a debit card. No cash; fine I'll pay the $2. Oh; by the way, renewals have gone up to $20. Fine; I'll pay the $22. Just take my gawdam picture and let me get out of this Hell for another 4 years.

Please enter your PIN Number. My What? PIN Number? I have never used this card as a debit card; I don't know what the PIN Number is.

Well then; they can't accept the card. 20 minutes of my life (and my lunch hour) down the tubes. And no renewed license.

So on Saturday I will need to visit the other Driver's License Bureau, where it will be packed, because it is the first of the month, and waste half of my Saturday morning doing something that should have been able to do on Friday. And I will have to stop and get cash; I'm not going through that debit card business again.

Or wait until Monday and leave work, go through security and wait in line behind yet another set of Dumasses - which for some reason appear to be attracted to government service windows, at least when I am in line- to make sure I can legally drive myself around for the next few years.

Maybe there something to be said for a streetcar. Except then I would be dealing with government employees daily instead of just every four years.

Allow me a few minutes to re-think this....

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